Happy and Blue 2

I’m all about titles for this post. Not so much about content.

So, without further ado or whatevers here are 9 things that you should resolve to do during the coming year:

1) Stop exercising.
Exercise is such a chore. You have to put on exercise clothing. And schedule a specific amount of time to do it. And beat yourself up when you miss a day..

Just walk to the store once in a while instead. Or walk somewhere with your family. You don’t even have to talk to them when you walk. Especially if you are gasping for breath.
Or go for a bike ride. Or skate. Or do some yard work. Plant some flowers.
Just don’t exercise. Exercising and the inevitable failure to do so will make you depressed.
So do something that’s fun instead.

2) Don’t commit yourself to blogging every day. It will just become a chore.

Writing should be fun. Not tortuous.
No one wants to read your half hearted attempt at putting up filler posts anyways. So don’t do that.
Write what you want, when you want. And when you don’t want to write anything don’t.

3) Don’t feel like you need to have hundreds of comments to feel successful.

Why did you start a blog in the first place? To get comments or because you wanted to write or pass on information.
I suppose if your intention is to make huge sums of money blogging then you need a huge audience but then you aren’t really a blogger anyways. Your a businessman/woman.
Enjoy the comments you do receive if they are nice and delete the mean ones.
But, mostly just write what you want and forget about the numbers. In the grand scheme of things a small group of friends is better than a large group of people who are just looking for links.

4) Push the chair away from the desk when a real human friend or family member wants to talk to you/ spend time with you.

Your online friends are your friends as well. Appreciate them.
But your family and real human friends are the ones who will be with you when you are puking your guts out because you drank to much or ate something that wasn’t quite right.
Don’t neglect them or take them for granted..

5) Be kind. To everyone. Even the jerks you meet.

Nothing beats being nice. Ever.
Even when everyone around you is being a jerk being nice is the way to be.
We all want the same things in life. To be happy. To get respect. To have approval.
Be the one who gives people those things. Sincerely. Because you are nice..

6) Stop worrying about life so much.

Last year I stopped reading newspapers and watching the news on tv. I also quit reading news about all the scary stuff happening in the world and in my neighborhood.
What I found was that I started viewing people differently. I talked to more people that, if I read the papers, I would have probably been afraid of. And they aren’t that scary when you get to know them.
I walked in places where crimes apparently had been committed. And I wasn’t assaulted.
I said hello to people I met and they didn’t hurt me. I helped some people who needed help and they didn’t try to take advantage of me.
Stop worrying so much. Live life.

7) Eat what you want to eat. Smoke if you want to. Have a drink. Take a risk doing some crazy activity. Enjoy life.

Everything in our lives appears to cause some disease and leads us to death.
Accept the fact that we all will die. It sucks I suppose. But it’s inevitable. Even if you lead a life of denial.

So, rather than deny yourself of things that give you pleasure, enjoy them.

8 ) Your life is your life. It doesn’t belong to anyone else.

Don’t let others try to make you anything you don’t want to be.
And don’t try to make your children or friends or family be what they aren’t either.
Be selfish. Focus on what works for you. Don’t let anyone shove their ideal you down your throat.
And don’t shift your focus to trying to make other people do what works for you.

9) Ummm..aside from writing shorter posts I’m out of ideas…
Hopefully you aren’t..

This is my 100th post on this version of Happy and Blue 2.

Hurray.

What great insights have I learned that I can pass on.

None..

ummm…Hurray…

“What do you think of these flowers?” Betty typed into her IPhone. “I’m forwarding you a picture of them right now.”

“The flowers are just what we are looking for.” came the reply. “Where are they?”

Just a minute replied Betty. “I’m getting a text from Jason and I need to read it.”

“Hey Betty. Everyone is hanging out at the pond. Want to come over.”

“Ok.” Betty texted back. And off she went.

“Betty. Where are you?” came the message from work. “We want to send some workers to the flowers you found.”

“At the pond” replied Betty. “Hang on Jenny is sending me a message.”

“Betty. Come over to my place right now. I have some great gossip to share.”

“Ok. Be there shortly.” replied Betty.

“Betty. Where are you?” came the message from work. “Flowers Betty..”

“Wait just a second” replied Betty. “I have another text coming in.”

“Betty. Big Party tonight at Dora’s. Can you come?”

“I’ll be there” replied Betty.

“Betty. Flowers. Where..” came the message from work.

“What flowers?” replied Betty.

“The ones you sent a picture of.” came the work message.

“Aren’t they pretty.” she replied looking at the flower picture.

“Yes. Pretty. Where are they?” her work replied.

“Just a minute. Jake is texting me.”replied Betty……

The life of bees is becoming more complex.
And that’s why it’s getting harder and harder to get good honey in the stores..

Before I make my 2010 resolutions I thought it would be a good time to explore the success of those made in 2009.

After all, as my Grandfather always said:
“If you don’t know where you’ve been you can’t eat spinach”

I often think Grandpa suffered from a form of dementia but it may have just been that fall off the roof onto his head that made his sayings cryptic.

Anyways, I’ve always followed his advice and as such I rarely eat spinach.
But I do try to see figure out where I’ve been and what being there has meant to me.

So, back to my 2009 resolutions. Which is where I had been prior to this year being almost over.

In 2009 I made resolutions. They were:

-Lose 20lbs.
-Start exercising more.
-Be nicer to the people I meet.

My current status on these resolutions is as follows:

Lose 20lbs
It dawned on me somewhere around July that I should either start this weight loss thing or accept the fact that I’m not really fat.
That guy on tv that had to have his house torn down so they could move him and his bed with a crane or something was fat.
He needs to lose 20lbs. Not me.
I still fit through my door.

Sure I don’t have six pack abs. But I have a one pack. And if I scrunch up just right I can make it look like a two pack.

So, in August I threw out 20lbs of diet food and I crossed that resolution off as done.

Start Exercising More
I love this resolution and I easily accomplished it.
More is such a relative term.

As soon as New Years Day, 2009, arrived I walked to the fridge and got a drink. Then I walked to the couch and sat down. Then I got right back up and made a sandwich and went right back to the couch.

Two walks where I used to just make one in stupid old 2008.

Done..

Be Nicer to People I Meet
The key to a great resolution is always in the wording.

Nicer and meet are such relative terms.

Nicer than what? I didn’t punch anyone which was nice of me.
If I’ve met someone before can I meet them again? I chose no as my answer.

This resolution is also done..

It’s nice to know that once again I’ve been successful with my resolutions.
Now on to 2010.

But first I need to buy some spinach..

We all make New Year’s Resolutions. Even the people who say they don’t do. Make resolutions that is.

Sometimes we make stupid resolutions. Ones like:

“In 2010 I am going to lose that 50lbs I gained in the last 2 decades”

Or,

“This year I am going to quit smoking and start exercising”

Actually the quit smoking resolution that is so popular often leads to the losing weight resolution that is also popular.

And the exercising resolution that is supposed to go with either of these really never does. Really, who wants to exercise when they are suffering trying to quit smoking or losing weight. Humans can only bear so much..

So Smarty McSmart, you’re probably thinking, if we shouldn’t resolve to lose weight, or quit smoking or exercise what the heck should we resolve to resolve.

Well, how about resolving to do one of these this year:

1) Resolve to talk to one human being. Not text a human. Not phone a human. Not grunt at someone or say “Hey, how’s it going” and then walk away.

Pick one stranger, preferably a stranger who doesn’t equal danger, and talk to them. Ask them questions. Answer their questions. Talk about life. Talk about kids. Talk about the best place to buy spinach in the off season. Talk about anything. Except sex and money. Unless you are talking to a prostitute I suppose.

2) Offer to help one person who needs help.
Someone is stuck in a snowdrift. Help push.
An old person walking on ice. Offer them your arm.
Knocked someone off their bike with your car/truck. Help them up.

3) Resolve to be nice to everyone you meet for one hour. Then go someplace where you can actually run across people. Real people. Mannequins don’t count. Mimes are pushing it as well.

4) Forgive one person for just one day. Someone who really made you angry. Or sad.
Like that annoying mime who kept making fake box shapes. Or your parents who forgot to pick you up after school that day resulting in you needing 20 years of intense psychotherapy and antidepressants to overcome your fear of abandonment.

5) Resolve to not take part in gossip about other people for 5 minutes. I think that’s as long as anyone has ever been able to pull that one off.

New years are supposed to be about new beginnings.

Why not make your new beginning about other people instead of yourself.
That way when you fail you will have someone else to blame..