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“I can now honestly admit I was 30-35lbs overweight when discovering Stories Your Parents Were Afraid To Tell You on the internet. At first I was very skeptical because there are so many story scams online, who can you really trust? Well as you can guess by viewing my picture I ended up trying this product for a 15 day period and lost 42.7lbs and decreased my body fat by 7.4%.***

Plus I have a huge secret to tell you and it maybe hard to believe this but I NEVER CHANGED MY DIET and by no means do I eat healthy. After using this product and seeing a dramatic change, it gave me the motivation to get back into reading Happy and Blue 2 and live a healthier life style. I’m a firm believer in what Happy and Blue 2 offers and will be a dedicated client for life!”

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Disclaimers:
*Fast is a relative term. You may be able to read the stories in this ebook “fast” or you may have other things going on in your life and it may take you far longer than 15 days.

**Free is also a relative term. To get the free ebook you need to sign up for the free newsletter. Which is also free. You can freely cancel your subscription to the newsletter at any time just by clicking on the link on the bottom of each newsletter. Of course that will make me sad. But that’s my problem..

***These results aren’t normal. Most people don’t exercise for 6 hours each day like these testimonial people do. So unless you plan to exercise like a banshee you likely won’t achieve the same results.

1: To eliminate 1000 calories you will have to read the stories while not eating. Just sitting there reading the story won’t work either. You have to be doing something to burn calories. Like jogging.
Jogging a marathon distance while reading will result in faster weight-loss BTW.

2: This product will boost energy levels if you are really depressed and then the story makes you laugh. People always feel more energetic when they are happy.

Editors note: This is only on the blog because I was looking at an ad for some weight loss product and I had been amusing myself by changing it for my ebook. It was in draft mode so I could see it when I hit publish by accident.
Since anything that is “published” appears on my RSS feed even if I delete it I just left it on my site.

“I hope Squeaky likes my gift” said Grandpa Mouse. “It’s so hard buying something for a one year old”

“I love Birthday parties” squeaked the other mice in unison. Or at least that’s what I think they squeaked. Mice are always squeaking and it may have been just random squeaking because a butterfly had landed on Grandpa’s back as he was whining.

“I hate Birthday parties! They’re so stressful. And so far from home. My legs hurt. Someone get that giant bug off my back” continued Grandpa. Rather loudly as well. I think he was going deaf so he spoke quite loudly.

“Who wouldn’t want wheat seeds?” replied Momma Mouse. “Now try to be quiet. The fox lives near hear and I don’t want him to find us.”

But of course it was to late. Freddie Fox had heard them and was waiting for them when they rounded the first turn on the path.

“Hello mice” said Freddie. “Who’s going to be my first snack today?”

Of course all the mice looked in Grandpa’s direction. A few even pointed and whistled at him.
Grandpa didn’t see them though. He was spinning around in circles trying to get the butterfly off his back.

“None of us would make a good snack” said Mother Mouse. “We are to thin at the moment.”
“Why don’t you wait until we are stuffed from the food at the Birthday party we are headed to. Then we will make a great meal for you.”

“Makes sense” said Freddie Fox. “See you back here in a few hours then”

“I think I smell a fox!” said Grandpa. “Everyone be careful and keep your eyes open”
Everyone, including Freddie Fox, laughed at those remarks. Apparently there is a lot more to laugh about when life is simple.

The Birthday party was a great success. Everyone played games and sang songs and ate and ate and ate some more. And before long it was time to head home.

“What are we going to do about that fox?” squeaked the children. “ We don’t want to be eaten!”

“Don’t worry” said Mother Mouse. “I have a plan.”
And off she headed onto the path and right to the bus stop.

“Bus tickets for everyone” she said as she pulled the tickets out of her mouse purse.

“We love you Momma” squeaked the mice.
And Grandpa said “My hip hurts. I hope the bus is the kind with a handicap entrance level.”

Of course the bus was just a normal bus. No handicap accessible ramp thing.
But Grandpa eventually got on and found a seat near the front where he could complain to the driver. Endlessly and loudly.
Aside from the loud complaining the trip back home was somewhat uneventful.

Freddie Fox did get on the bus but since there was a “No Food or Drinks” sign he couldn’t eat the mice.
And he lived 2 stops before the mice stop so they got home safely.

Freddie did mutter “Rats. Foiled again.” when he left the bus but no one is sure if he was frustrated by the turn of events involving the bus or if he was just thinking about barbecuing rats wrapped in tin foil for his snack.

And Grandpa got a hearing aid the next day.
When his next pension cheque arrives in a month he is hoping, as are the rest of the Mouse family, that he can afford to buy some batteries to make it work.

So todays question is:
1) Do you like Birthday parties?

Some people, like those living in Mosolo for example, had fewer choices. When you have nothing you must continually work to survive. There is only one choice.

But Zimble didn’t live in Mosolo. His choices seemed unlimited.
And that was the problem.

When it really doesn’t make a difference whether you do one thing or another then doing nothing is as good an option as all the rest.

In Zimble’s life starting and stopping things happened regularly.
He had taken beginnings and endings to define his way of life.

Zimble would start a job, quit it and start another one.
He would start exercising regularly and then decide one day that he didn’t have the time and would stop.
He would work on his diet and then eat junk food the next week.
He would write and write and then stop writing on a whim.
He would…

Zimble envied those with more focus than he had.
Those who started something and completed it.
The ones who have the desire to carry on even though they don’t have to.

But Zimble was stuck in an endless loop of starting something, reaching a point where he realized that by just pushing on a little longer he would become successful and then stopping.

Knowing that you can do something if you wanted to seemed to be enough for Zimble.
Actually doing it seemed to hold little reward for him.

And he would back away at just the point where it was within his grasp to achieve something worthwhile and he would do something else.
The point just before he could make a difference in either his life or the lives of others.

When Zimble finally died there was nothing written about him in history books. ( I was actually shocked that I could find out so much about him. It’s almost like I knew him personally..)
Certainly he was listed as existing. There are records kept of everything.

But it was just a name. Useful for family trees perhaps, but little else.

No one remembers ordinary people. They are but filler in the records of life.

So today’s question is:
1) Do you care about where your life is heading?

Of course inanimate objects survive quite well without todo lists but they use complex calculus ( scientific speculation as most science is) to keep themselves organized. And in man, woman, dog and cat kinds defense things like rocks and clouds and such have been around far longer than we have so they have had more time to evolve into higher beings than we have.

But in the animal and bird and plant kingdoms life without the todo list is unimaginable.

The best feature of a well thought out todo list is that once something has been written down we don’t have to actually do it.

It’s on the list. We are going to do it. Someday. Not today of course. And certainly not right away.

If we did it right away we would have nothing to do. It would be done.

To the best of my knowledge no one has created a todone list where we only list things that we have already done. And even if they did having to record what we have done would require a todo list of todone items.

So we are stuck with just a todo list.

It’s an endless cycle really.

We create a todo list and as we do the things on the list they are replaced by new todo things.

I needed to write a post for my site so I added it to my todo list. And when this was done I crossed it off. And then I added a new todo item to write another post for my site.
See, it’s endless…

To quote Shakespeare in his original draft of Hamlet:

To do a list of todo items, or not to do: that is the question:
Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous todo items,
Or to take arms against a sea of forgotten stuff,
And by opposing end them? To die: todo ;
No more; and by a todo to say we end..

I suppose if Shakespeare felt so strongly about todo lists it must be necessary for we regular humans as well.

So, today’s question is:
1) What do you have to do today?

But where this story took place it was normal. So the night was dark. Not like in the wacky North Pole where anything goes with light and dark.

Keddie had slept through the dark night. As is often the case.
And now it was morning and the Sun was shining so he woke up. As is often the case as well.

“Well, it’s back to work for me.” said Keddie in a booming voice.

“Shut the @#$%$% up you loud @$$!!$.” said his wife Lettie.

Lettie had been kept away all night because Keddie also snored in a booming snoring type voice. And like most of the neighbors on the block she wasn’t pleased with being kept awake all night.

“Yes, yes, I love you too” replied Keddie still in a booming voice. Apparently Keddie was pretty much deaf. Or he was like most married men and just tuned out whatever his wife was saying..

Anyways within an hour he was off to his job as the town’s air raid siren.

Keddie had worked at many other jobs before landing this one.

He had a brief job at a china store. Which ended as soon as he greeted his first customer and shattered all the china in the shop. He’s still paying for the china destroyed at that job.

And he worked in a circus for a while. Until the fateful day when his booming voice scared the lion tamer’s lions and they ate the lion tamer.
Keddie’s lawyer got him out of paying the lion tamer’s family for their loss by putting a question in the juries mind about a lack of protein in the lion’s diet. That and the lion tamer’s costume made him look appealing. Well, to the lions anyways. Actually most people, including the lion tamer’s wife and his children, just thought the lion tamer looked somewhat gay in the costume. In a jovial way I suppose.

Keddie also worked as a cruise ship employee for a while. But it didn’t work out to well either. Appaently the Titanic sank* when his voice overpowered the warning horn that signaled a change in direction was necessary to avoid an iceberg or something.

He survived the sinking by bellowing loud enough for help that he gave a whale a heart attack. So he floated to safety on the back of the dead whale and ate blubber until he arrived safely at shore years later..

*History records the sinking differently of course because the few that survived recalled Keddie’s “Would you like another round” to the bar patrons as “We’re all going to drown” being announced by the Captain..

Anyways, Keddie finally got the job as the town air raid siren when the electricity went out in his town during a storm and the siren failed to work. Which shows that there is a job for anyone.

So, the story of Keddie is both inspirational and some other words I can’t think of..

And today’s question is:
1)Do you know anyone with a really loud voice that you wish would just quit talking?

Editor’s note: Keddie’s wife left him shortly after this story was written. She now sleeps soundly during the night in a city far, far away.

Keddie is so absorbed in his work that he hasn’t noticed Lettie is missing yet. He is however wondering who keeps stealing the supper she used to make him each night..

Jubo trained his mice to drag his slippers over to him when he got home.
And he trained his mice to use a mouse litter box.
And he eventually trained his mice to not eat holes in his walls or eat his sandwiches when he put them down to answer the phone.

But Jubo grew tired of training his mice for simple things.

So, one day, while reading a dogsledding magazine in the doctor’s office he decided to take the plunge and train his mice for the Iditarod. Which is a famous dog sled race so I’ve been told. Although I have to admit I’ve been told a lot of things that turned out to be false so who knows if this is true either.

Anyways, Jubo believed it. And since the story is about him and his mice that’s all that really matters.

Jubo set to work as soon as he returned from the doctor’s office.

His first challenge was to build a mouse sled that looked like the one in the picture which he had ripped out of the doctor’s magazine while pretending to cough.

He tried using a block of cheese first. Cheese is easy to carve. But the mice ate the cheese sled leaving only the macaroni runners he had taped on the bottom.

Next he tried carving a sled out of ice cream. Which is also easy to carve. But in the morning the sled was gone from the kitchen counter.

“Darn those mice” he thought to himself as he cleaned up the mysterious mess ,that looked like melted ice cream, that the mice had left behind.

Next he taught the mice how to clean up messes on the counter.

And then he hired a carpenter to build the mouse sled.

Over the next few months Jubo worked with his team of mice until they could run around the neighborhood pulling the sled really, really fast. So fast in fact that he was ticketed for speeding twice while trying to keep up to them in his car.

When it was time for the big race Jubo took his mice and their mouse sled to Alaska and registered them for the race. And since he had named his mice dog names no one at the registration desk questioned his entry. Until the next day.

On the day of the race, with all the sleds lined up, the race judges told Jubo that he would have to ride on the sleigh if they were to stay in the race. Or he could run along beside them.

So, Jubo said he would run with his mouse team and the race started.

For a long time the mice were ahead in the race. Jubo ran along beside them.

And then after the long time, about 30 feet I’m told, Jubo collapsed. Apparently he wasn’t in good shape.

The mice did win the race. They even set a record for the fastest time ever.

But of course it didn’t count. All because of Jubo being out of shape. The mice were furious of course.

Back at home the mice left Jubo and moved into an abandoned warehouse where they live happily to this very day.

And Jubo joined a gym and dreams of the day when he can be re-united with his mice.
In the mean time he is training turtles for seeing guard turtle services or something.

So, todays question is:
1) Have you ever owned an unusual pet?

Of course Gary took the lead. Not because men always lead but because he was stronger than Ester. After all he had been using a Wormflex for 3 months now while she had used her spare money to sign up for art lessons.

So Gary had 40 pack abs and big shoulders. And Ester was kind of lumpy but could draw like a banshee..

They were almost at the surface when they heard the footsteps above them. Loud footsteps. Kind of like those of a Robin. A Robin that was looking for worms to eat.

“Well, fiddledee dee” said Gary. And Ester, who was right behind him agreed.

“What now Gary?” said Ester said in a quiet voice. As all worms use I suppose. I’ve never heard a worm yell.

“We go to plan “B” said Gary.

And so they did what every earth worm named Gary with a plan “B” would do in such a case.

Gary kept digging closer and closer to the surface until there was just a thin layer of soil between him and the Robin.

And then ever so carefully he slipped his head into the pocket of his sweat pants. Earthworms don’t have arms or hands apparently. But they do wear sweat pants because the elastic waistband helps keep them on.

Once he had his head in the pocket of his sweatpants he pulled out a large Gummy worm.

Ester was disappointed but not really surprised at what Gary had in his sweatpants.
It wasn’t like they were planning on getting married or anything. Nor would they be she thought to herself.

Anyways, Gary then pushed the Gummy worm through the top layer of soil.

And the Robin grabbed it right away.

The good thing about Gummy worms is that they are sticky. So within seconds the Robin was so busy trying to free the two halves of his beak from the sticky candy that Gary and Ester were able to slip past him and play in a puddle until the rain stopped 3 days later.

When Gary and Ester returned home they were quite in love.
Gary proposed to Ester and Ester said no. But she said she did love him like a brother.
Which didn’t really make him feel all that great.

Ester married an Earthworm named Barlow who was a famous Earthworm artist.

And Gary went on to open his own gym. He never married.

Oh, and the Robin got his beak open eventually. He has sworn off Earthworms and now gets all his meals at McD’s..

So today’s question is:
1) What’s your favorite bird?

“We aren’t there yet” said Mother. “We’ll be there soon.”

“I’m bored.” said Jilly. “This is so borrrrrinnnngggg!!!!!”

“Read a book or something” said Father.

“Jilly is punching me” said Nilly. “Make her stop.”

“Stop punching Nilly, Jilly” said Mother.

“No I’m not.”said Jilly. “Mom, Nilly is lying. Make him stop lying.”

“Both of you settle down” said Father. “No punching and no lying or I’ll turn this car around and we’ll go home.”

“I have to go potty.” said Jilly. “I have to go NOW!!!!!”

“We’re almost there. Just hold it” said Mother.

“I’m carsick!” said Nilly. “Stop the car. I’m going to throw up.”

“I’m not stopping the car. Just throw up in your backpack” said Father.

“I’m hungry.” said Jilly. “Can we get something to eat soon?”

“You just ate 5 minutes ago. We’ll eat again at Grandma’s” said Mother.

“Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?” both children screamed in unison.

“No we aren’t. No we aren’t. No we aren’t.” screamed Father and Mother in unison.

And then Nilly and Jilly took a break. Practicing for their trip to Grandma’s was hard work.

And in another room Father and Mother also took a break from trip practice. Some people say that they also took some medication to calm them down as well but I never witnessed that part.

Meanwhile Grandma was happily creating extra sugary treats for her Grandchildren to eat. On their way back home..

So today’s question is:
1) Do you ever wonder about the motives of Grandparents?

But Rabbits like carrots and all those behind them knew this.

So first the Fox offered them a carrot it they could change places.
And the Rabbits thought it would be ok. Because there would be plenty of fine looking tails and ears left if they moved back one place in line and ate their carrot.

And then the Horses offered them a carrot. Not a terribly good carrot because horses like carrots as well, but a slightly used carrot with wilted leaves.

The Rabbits looked at the carrot and decided it would be ok so they traded places with the Horses. And while they waited in line they ate the carrot.

The Cows were next. They wanted a long tail to shoo flies with. So they offered some hay which the rabbits rejected. But eventually the Cows offered a carrot which they got from a Pig who wanted to move ahead of the Cows to get a curly tail.

The Pigs had lots of carrots for some reason. So they traded spaces to get their curly tails and a cute flat nose with other animals that wanted to move up in line.

Soon the Rabbits had eaten so many carrots that they needed a nap.

And while the Rabbits napped other animals snuck ahead of them in line.

When the Rabbits woke up the line was almost gone.

All that was left behind them were the Elephants and Hippopotamus family.

The Elephants wanted a long bushy tail the fox had already taken and the nose that the Pigs had already taken.
And the Hippopotamus family just wanted a full set of teeth.

The Elephants snuck some carrots from the Rabbits pile, offered them to the Rabbits and moved ahead in line.
And the Hippos just moved ahead by threatening to sit on the Rabbits if they didn’t get out of their way.

Of course the Elephants had to settle for a tiny tail and a long nose. Which they chose because, although it was long, it did have a flat part like a Pig nose. And they found that very attractive.

The Hippo’s ended up with few teeth. There just weren’t any full sets of teeth left.

And when the Rabbits finally got to the front of the line there were no tails left.

So, they had to settle for a fluffy duster for a tail. And some long fuzzy ears that looked suspiciously like bottle brushes rolled in dust.

“Well we look stupid” said the Rabbits.

But it was to late to complain at that point.
The door to the selection room was closed in their faces.

So, they hopped away. After laughing at the Hippo’s teeth of course.

So today’s question is:
Have you ever given up your place in line and regretted it?

Her friends didn’t want to listen to her any more. They even told her not to play when they were around. In a nice way of course. They were her friends after all.

And her parents were beginning to wonder why they had ever agreed to buy her a guitar in the first place. Or let her take lessons. Especially since they didn’t seem to be helping.

As she sat on her front step staring at the guitar she began to cry.

“Why can’t I do this? Why is everything so hard?”

Finally, as often happens when we are sad, Kelly’s sadness turned to anger.

And she grabbed the guitar and began strumming loudly. Almost as though she wanted to break the strings. Which secretly she did want to happen. Although it wasn’t a very good secret because I figured it out.

But something entirely different happened.

The strings didn’t break. And the sound she made sounded different. Good even.

“That’s really good.” said someone walking down the street in front of her home.”Did you write it?”

Kelly looked up to see a boy who was about her age just standing there. After he stopped walking and starting standing in one place of course.

“I wish I could play like that” the boy continued.

Kelly was confused by the boys appearance. She knew everyone in her neighborhood and she had never seen this boy before.

“Do you live around here?” she asked.

“No” he replied. “I’m just visiting my Grandparents next door. I live across the country so I don’t get to visit them often.”

“I heard you playing and I just had to see who it was.” he continued.

They talked for a few more minutes and then he had to go.

Kelly never saw him again. The boys Grandparents died in a horrific wolf attack that year. As often happens to Grandparents whose children move away and leave them to fend for themselves in wolf infested neighbourhoods.

But, later in her life she still remembers the boy. Every time she picks up her guitar and plays for her children she sees his face. And remembers what he said to her.
It was a moment in time that changed her. And he probably would never know.
Just some words from a stranger..

So today’s question is:
Have you ever felt a connection with someone who probably doesn’t know it?