Happy and Blue 2

At the moment I feel like a thief. A story thief. But a story XUP wrote about superhero’s once again got me thinking about something.

As a kid I always wondered why no one recognized Superman.

He would change from the clothes he wore to work into some tights and do his Superman thing. He didn’t wear a mask. He didn’t change his hairstyle.

We recognize people by their facial features. But no one did in his case..

And I wondered, probably like lots of other kids, why no one knew it was just plain old Clark Kent dressed up in tights that was doing all the Superman stuff.

As an adult I think I understand how he pulled it off.

We don’t really look at people. We think we do. But we don’t.

It’s not what people”s faces look like that we notice. It’s what they do or say that we remember. What they do and say is how we associate with them.

That’s why, when we see someone who looks poor, we associate them with bums.

If we walked by someone who looks dirty and downtrodden we automatically clutch our wallets or if you are female your purse I suppose.

But, if in a blink of an eye, or a second or two in a phone booth, the person changed into a suit, and reappeared in front of us, we wouldn’t recognize them.
We would release our death grip on the wallet or purse, perhaps say hello as we passed by and not even recognize the same face staring back at us..

Superman had a power that all of us appear to possess that was never talked about.
The power of invisibility..
Dressed as Clark Kent he became no one in particular. Same face, Zero recognition.

We have all experienced this to some degree or another.
You walk into a gathering of strangers and become invisible.
Until you say or do something to someone, no one even knows you exist.

In the past few years I’ve spent a lot of time talking to these invisible people.
And until today I always wondered why asking something as simple as “How’s your day been?” has often been met with such an enthusiastic response to talk.
As though I was the only person who spoke to them that whole day..

Now, I understand why..
I probably was………

So, question for you is:
1) Have you ever felt invisible to those around you?

Editor’s note: The post picture is of me using my superpower of invisibility..
And no…just because I have big ears doesn’t mean I have super hearing. Sure I hear voices in my head all the time but my team of psychiatrists say they are internal, not external..

1) Decorate a tree outside. Umm..with nuts and berries or tree huggers. Just not with anything that looks like it might be environmentally unfriendly.

2) Try to find a turkey that died of natural causes. Like old age.
Resist the urge to scare one to death by howling like a wolf or something.

3) Don’t cook any of the food. Including the turkey. Heat uses scarce resources and contributes to global warming. It is environmentally friendly to slow cook the turkey under your arm if you just can’t stomach raw meat. I think the rule of thumb is one year/ pound..

4) Only wear Christmas clothing made out of environmentally approved fabrics. These would include dead leaves, empty shells if you live near the ocean or snow if you live in Manitoba like me.

5) Try to avoid passing gas. It will soil your clothing, especially the snow clothing, and it also causes an increase in methane gas which is destroying our atmosphere.

6) Don’t breathe any more than necessary because our breath makes carbon dioxide. Which is bad for the environment.
If you feel the urge to breath try to do it into a plant or tree. Plants and trees like carbon dioxide and will give back oxygen. Which is kind of nice of them. Feel free to hug your plants. Just do the hugging carefully. Apparently dead plants give off carbon dioxide as they decompose. Which is odd when you think about it. Humans don’t give off oxygen as they decompose. Which is why some scientists now believe that humans are vegetable based, not animal based as previously thought.

7) If you plan on visiting family for some strange reason, walk. Cars, trucks, trains, planes, et.al. are killing our planet. I think taking the bus may still be ok though. But be sure to check it out on Google before you do that.

8 ) Gifts of anything other than plants or seeds are a travesty against nature. Make this a joyful Christmas, not a Planet destroying free for all filled with clothing, Ipods and other stuff like toys..

9) Turn the heat down in your house. To not being on at all preferably. We are running out of energy. Might as well get used to suffering in that piece of brick and wood you call home.

10) If it gets to cold for you feel free to warm up in front of that unlit fireplace. Drink some ice cold chocolate milk for an added good time. Nothing beats an ice cold cup of chocolate milk on a chilly day.

Share love and joy with everyone you meet. After all, in two years it will be 2012 and we’ll all be dead. Unless the Mayans were wrong. Or they wanted to play a sick practical joke on the lovely Europeans who discovered the America’s and set to work sharing “democracy” with them.

But regardless of all that Mayan stuff enjoy your holidays. And have a Merry and green Christmas. Do your part to save the Planet. I would join you but I’ve already bought carbon credits so I can thumb my nose at Mother Nature..

Most people have heard the story of the Little Drummer Boy who played his drum for Jesus. It’s a true story. Archaeologists found remnants of the drum back in 1986. You can Google it if you don’t believe me.

But, the same Archeologists also found a tuba in the same location.

They of course, as scienticians do, quickly hid the news of the tuba find because there was no cute story involving a tuba. Especially, as it turned out, a tuba played by a girl.
A girl who played a tuba for the baby Jesus was just wrong to scienticians.

So the scienticians said the tuba was pushed up into the wrong time period through rock shifts, and made up a lesser story about a little girl who played a tuba for mean cave men or something.

No one liked the story so it never made the #1 best seller list on book sites and it quickly fell into oblivion. Until now..

The truth is that that little girl did play her tuba for Jesus sake. And by that I do mean for the sake of the birth of Jesus. And not the other potential meaning which could be taken as a swearing type statement.

The little girl didn’t know the Little Drummer Boy but she did know how to wail on that tuba. And this is her story.

Tina got her first tuba on a Tuesday. Which may have been a Wednesday in modern times as all the days in B.C. appear to travel backwards in history.
Anyways, it was a Tuesday in her day and she got the tuba from her parents for getting an A+ on her report card.

Tina played that tuba all the time and soon became famous in her village for her tuba tooting.

Then one day she noticed a bright light in the sky and sneaking out of her bedroom window, which was easy in those days due to the fact that glass hadn’t been invented yet so windows were just holes in the wall, she headed towards the light.

On her way she noticed Three Wise Men playing poker. And they asked her where she was going.

“I’m heading towards the light” Tina said.

The Three Wise Men being wise wrote that down for use later in movies where someone has died and someone else says “Head towards the light”. Their families still collect royalties on that saying I think, mostly from horror movie producers and such.

Anyways, after the wise men finished their poker hands they offered to take Tina and her tuba towards the light. And she agreed to go with them because in those days “Stranger equals danger” hadn’t been invented yet.

They arrived at the birthplace of Jesus just as the LIttle Drummer Boy had finished his annoying drumming.

Jesus was crying his head off. After all babies need sleep. Not drumming.

Tina set to work right away playing a lullaby on her tuba. If anyone could play a soothing lullaby on a tuba it was Tina and within moments Jesus was asleep. As were Mary, Joseph, the Wise Men and the Little Drummer Boy. Oh, and two sheep and a camel.

Sadly Tina had to leave her tuba with the inn keeper to get enough money to catch the bus home. And she never got it back.
She also didn’t get to be in any of the pictures of the manger scene because she had to leave before they were drawn.

Tina lived out the rest of her life in relative obscurity as a coat check girl in a village bar. But she made good tips so she was blessed I suppose.

Anyways, now you know the true story.

When a man says he wants a Duwalt 1/4 Hammer Drill from Home Depot, which costs $149 on sale, for Christmas that does not mean that he will be just as happy with the Wallyman one from another store that sells for $18.95.

Just so you know..

As a point of reference to women anywhere if you ask for Estée Lauder perfume do you really mean any makeup product will do?